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The Banjo-Guitar And Low Music

 “When It’s Ragtime In Nevada” has once again been rejected for a boondoggle grant under the NEW WORKS IN THE FIELD OF HIGH MUSIC program of the Advanced Committee for The Elevation of Undanceable Art and Cosmic Innovation. University audiences must continue to leave the safe confines of laundry list poetry and travel to UNLIKELY LOCATIONS in order to hear LOW MUSIC beaten to a hot pulp on the banjo-guitar. Purists of the AUTHENTIC early sounds of the resonant and well-strung skin head may certainly continue to pursue museum policies without the benefit of HYBRID SUBLIMNITY.

Folk life cowboy graduates and overeducated JAZZ intellectuals have thus declared a moratorium on the chicken scratch TWO-STEP and have sought to outsource the ONE-STEP—to date without takers. The International Unconvention of Banjo-Guitarists has thus determined that having abandoned LOW MUSIC, the public has taken to self-medication in an effort to withstand regular DOSES of electric shock—now promoted under the label COOL MUSIC. Several trust fund babies have posted videos of barely tepid tones featuring lots of notes at a blazing speed in the hopes of proving that NOTHING MATTERS except measurable craft.

Fortunately, in the midst of this fascist situation, THE HOT TWO continues to hold forth with rabidly effervescent toe tappers. “LOW MUSIC will be back,” they’ve been heard to declare.

Our Philosophy

Stay tuned…THE HOT TWO IS working hard to create OUR PHILOSOPHY. When rounded out, OUR PHILOSOPHY will be submitted in a resubmission and will forward the GREAT DREAM-to make the saloon more like the opera house and vice-versa. In the mean time, minstrels starve-replaced by THRASHERS documenting their personal angst. THE HOT TWO make a guarantee that the demise of rhythm, lift and space, addiction to power and the enslavement of the masses that has replaced real dancing will not color OUR PHILOSOPHY in the slightest.

The True Cowbell

Cowbell imitators have appeared frequently in the parlors of the NABOB. This SAD state of affairs will be remedied for all applicants upon the appearance of THE HOT TWO at which time the TRUE COWBELL will be revealed. The TRUE COWBELL can be detected by the unbridled passion, the raw emotion and utter conviction with which the COWBELLIST attempts to strike the stationary object. Unlike other healing events, the TRUE COWBELL appears only when the MIND of the listener has been purified by licking the lips, fidgeting in the chair, leaping into the air and shouting, “Whoopee!”

Links to the World of Classic American music.

Classic Jazz Collection (requires RealAudio Player)

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